Friday, June 15, 2007
there are so many things i wish you'd understand but you probably can't.
No, it's not that i think you wont try, but it's because i don't tell.
you see, there's a difference in the methods we use to tackle problems - you prefer to thrash it out calmly, but for me, it's either i get into a heated argument (and most of the time, still dont settle the problem because you know my problem when it comes to face-to-face) OR i would keep to myself entirely.
reason being, i feel frustrated when the other party doesnt understand what's going on (in my mind) - so i dont speak at all.
to me, the moment i let the words slip out of my mouth, the problem becomes real. then it creates another problem of having to solve it.
but it's different if i keep it to myself.
you see, the problem affects only me and after im through mulling over it, it disappears.
besides, you're cooped up in that bunk with 10+ other men about 5 days a week; sleep is precious to you because you need to work hard during the day and i know you tend to make mistakes once you're distracted.
so i dont see the point in making you stay up through the night to listen to my woes and then having you worry if i'll be fine when there's really nothing you can do...
i'd tell you everything if you were standing right before me because we always misunderstand each other through sms while on the phone, our sighs just dont help at all.
do you understand now, my dear?
♥ my red umbrella
10:29
